Beyond Vertigo

Poetry and Visual Art

By Eileen McCabe

 

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About Me

I am originally from North Reading, Massachusetts, born July 2, 1960. I'm the oldest of 6 children, and like many eldest children, have forged a path very different than that of my siblings. I was deeply influenced by an 8th grade English teacher, who bragged about her membership in SDS and her file with the FBI. On the first day of class, she told us; "My job is not to tell you what to think, but how to think." We kept journals for the entire year, to fill with whatever was significant to us. Watergate broke that fall. My journal was filled with newspaper clippings, concrete poetry, and rants against those lying bastards Kissinger and Nixon. My family moved to Colorado when I was 15, and I had a miserable time trying to adjust to the prairie. I have always felt most at home among the massive white pines of the northeast and the explosive colors of autumn. I was heavily involved in theatre and vocal music.

As an adult, I fled back east for college in Ithaca, NY. I got a BFA in Theatrical Design and Technology in 1982. If you are ever looking for a Jack Kerouac on-the-road experience, I recommend Greyhound from Ithaca to Denver. 52 hours through small towns and bus stations will show you an America you won't see on TV. I spent a few years starving doing a combination of fast-food, retail and summer stock, mostly as a costumer and prop master, before I decided that a regular paycheck held great appeal.

New Jersey for a bit, Colorado for a bit to go to computer programmer school, back to Massachusetts for a wonderful six years, then Maryland for a year, then North Carolina for two.

I now live in the Salt Lake Valley in Utah. My husband and I had 2 children together, but have recently parted after several years of denying our deep philosophical differences and suffering crippling depression. I suppose all marital endings are traumatic, but I tried to find something valuable in the pain and upheaval, and started writing poetry through the transition. It was like emerging from a state of suspended animation. I discovered collage and assemblage about the same time, and collect trash items for sculpture. My workroom looks more like a landfill than an art studio.

I'm not sure which has been the more difficult adjustment living in Utah; learning to love the sparse beauty of the sage flats, or surviving the strange and conservative politics. I don't feel at home in a place until I know the smells and the plants. I need to know what grows where and when. Perhaps as a result much of my poetry uses natural imagery either literally or figuratively. When asked about Salt Lake City, I say two things; poetry and beer. Salt Lake City has more spoken word venues in coffee houses and clubs than Los Angeles. There's an incredible mix of age, gender, and social background that comes together for these events. There are several literary groups that meet on a regular basis, a great book festival in the fall and a Slam team that has travelled to Nationals for several years now. SLC also boasts several excellent brew pubs, and many medals at the Great American Beer Festival. I kid you not - you have to try it. One of the little jokes that the gods have played on Northern Utah, is that in this teetotaler's Zion, we boast a unique varietal of hops that grows wild in Cache Valley. Go figure. In the reddest state in the country, Salt Lake City boasts one of the most progressive and effective mayors in the country, and it has been a joy to work with him on things like Bush Bash 2005.

It is a special kind of stress to come from liberal Massachusetts, and land in conservative Utah, but one that can lead to lots of creative ferment. You can't be complacent here, and you have to be willing to stand up and be counted. I'd now describe myself as a radical progressive. I'm a Wobbly (Industrial Workers of the World) and a Radical Cheerleader, a member of the Green Party, and an anti-nuclear activist. I live for those moments when you can show someone something unexpected that sows the seeds for change in them. I use poetry, puppets, street theatre, costumes, (I guess my degree was actually good for something) and age-defying magic to effect change. I believe in direct action, and the coming revolution and welcome it with open arms.

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